Reaching my potential.

This post may hit a chord with my fellow stay-at-home moms.  Now that the wedding is done, the club that I was running has been suspended pending more members and interest, the house is *mostly* finished, and I am temporarily feeling "healthy" again while on my antibiotics, I am at a loss.  First came the yearning for a job or creative outlet.  Then came the feeling that I need to use my brain and accomplish something.  Then, I went back to reading "mommy-blogs."  This, in itself, is a practice that can make any woman feel inadequate.  These women have amazing lives...multi-tasking between making a living at blogging, traveling to speak at blog forums and on subjects they have blogged about, raising money for charities, caring for their plethora of kids (the average amount is FIVE), photographing moments of their lives with professional quality, and then there is the matter of their STYLE.  Their homes are spontaneous, creative, put together, unusual, daring, chic, and inspiring.  Their clothing, hair, makeup...all fresh, polished, and hip.  Their children wear bohemian meets classic European designer and handmade clothing.  Even the toys their children play with are cool.  I'm sure there are loads of product placement opportunities when blogging and this MUST contribute to their cool factor but I can't help but look at these sites and wonder where I went wrong.  I am intelligent, creative, a pretty good writer, and have PLENTY of subjects that I can write about with first-hand experience.  I've lived an interestingly diverse life.  I've traveled.  Before kids, I got to have my dream job.  I have style.  Yet somehow, I am accomplishing nothing outside of my "homemaker/child-raiser" role.  Where did I go wrong?  How do I catch a ride on the amazing life train?  The life where I feel completely fulfilled in every sense.  The ride that includes a life of my own, outside of the roles I play in other people's lives.  I can't find the ticket, but I'm ready to ride!